Do you constantly question your skills and abilities?
Are you frequently worrying about making mistakes or falling short of what others expect of you?
Perhaps you even struggle to understand your own needs and establish healthy boundaries in relationships and work.
If any of this resonates with you, you might be grappling with an anxiety disorder marked by perfectionism, poor boundaries, over-explaining, and low self-worth—often leading to feelings of shame.
"Anxiety was born in the very same moment as [human]kind. And since we will never be able to master it, we will have to learn to live with it—just as we have learned to live with storms."
In a society that often values productivity above all else, it’s no surprise that perfectionism has become a toxic companion. What may seem like a desire for excellence often stems from anxiety, and it can take a huge toll on your mental health and relationships.
Perfectionism is tied to unrealistically high standards, and the pressure to meet them can leave you drained. When failure inevitably happens, it’s often met with harsh self-criticism. Some may even avoid making progress altogether to avoid the risk of failure. These perfectionist tendencies often arise from deep-seated self-doubt and fears of rejection, often rooted in early life experiences.
If you’re constantly worried about what others think of you, you may find yourself over-explaining your actions and struggling to set healthy boundaries. This compulsion to justify yourself is often a defense mechanism to avoid criticism or disapproval.
This need for external validation can make it difficult to say “no” or assert your own needs. You may find yourself agreeing to things you’d rather not do or failing to speak up when your boundaries are crossed.
Over time, this pattern can lead to:
Feelings of exhaustion and burnout
Growing resentment toward others
A diminished sense of self-worth
Increased anxiety in social situations
Difficulty identifying and expressing your own desires
These behaviors can significantly affect your mental health, relationships, and overall satisfaction with life.
“No" is a complete sentence.”
At the root of anxiety, perfectionism, and over-explaining is often a lack of self-esteem. When you don’t believe in yourself, you enter a harmful cycle of self-doubt that makes it hard to trust your own decisions or feel proud of your achievements.
Low self-esteem can make it difficult to:
Trust your judgment
Feel good about your accomplishments
See yourself in a positive light
Instead, you might constantly view your actions through a lens of self-criticism, feeling as though you need others’ approval to feel valid. This pattern affects everything from decision-making to relationships and overall happiness.
Left unchecked, low self-esteem can give rise to shame—an overwhelming emotion that tells us we are flawed, unworthy, or not enough. Shame makes us hide parts of ourselves and can make us withdraw from others, especially those we care about, for fear they’ll see our perceived imperfections.
The goal of therapy is to help you confront and heal this shame. By understanding and addressing these deep-rooted feelings, we can begin the process of reclaiming your self-worth and self-acceptance.
"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it."
In my practice, I specialize in helping individuals break free from the cycle of anxiety driven by perfectionism and self-doubt. I use a compassionate, proven approach that helps you understand and overcome these patterns, while rebuilding your self-esteem.
Together, we can work to help you regain control of your thoughts, feelings, and body sensations—empowering you to live a more fulfilling life that aligns with your true desires and values.
I combine various therapeutic techniques to support your healing journey:
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): A powerful tool to challenge the beliefs fueling your anxiety, addressing perfectionism and self-criticism.
Somatic Therapy: Focuses on the body-mind connection, helping you release physical tension tied to anxious thoughts and promoting emotional regulation.
Internal Family Systems (IFS): Helps harmonize the different parts of your psyche, enabling you to understand and soothe your anxious thoughts with compassionate self-leadership.
Through this process, you’ll develop the skills to:
Replace self-defeating thoughts with more accurate self-assessments
Cultivate unconditional self-acceptance
Reconnect with your authentic needs and values
Establish and maintain healthy boundaries
This transformative process empowers you to:
Build self-confidence and leadership
Trust your own judgment
Foster meaningful relationships
Align your life with your true aspirations
Maybe you’re wondering: what if it’s too much, too fast, too soon?!
That’s totally understandable! We’ve all been there—trying to change too much at once, only to return to old habits with feelings of shame. We’ll work at a pace that feels right for you, tuning in to your body’s cues. If something feels too fast, we’ll slow down. The key to lasting change is to respect your limits, with you and your body leading the way.
What if I don’t know who I am without my anxiety?
The goal isn’t to change who you are, but to free yourself from the restrictive thought patterns and behaviors that anxiety has created. Anxiety is not your enemy; it’s an alert system your brain uses to get your attention. We simply need to learn to understand when it’s helpful—and when it’s not.
Together, we’ll explore how to make anxiety work for you, not against you.
Will I be coerced into taking medication?
Your treatment is always in your hands. While I can educate you about medication options and provide referrals if necessary, any decision about medication is entirely up to you. My role is to support you in whatever decision feels right for your healing journey.
When we share our feelings—especially our shame—with trusted friends or a therapist, we open the door to healing. With empathy and understanding, we can start to rebuild our self-esteem and transform our relationship with ourselves and others.
If you’re ready to explore this journey of self-discovery, schedule a free consultation today. I’m excited to support you in taking your life back.
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